Power Rankings: Married…with Children, Part 2

10 Jan

Part 2 of the Married..with Children Power Rankings, where we get to the real meat of the rankings, the top 3.  Part 1 can be located here.

3.  Christina Applegate (as Kelly Bundy) – There’s a huge gap between the bottom four and the first three.  All of the top three have had incredibly impressive careers and I’m not really confident in how I ranked them; the continuing level of success of their current shows could change their ranking at any time.  Applegate gets points as the main star of her current show, but it’s only been on for one season and hasn’t reached the level of success of the current shows of the top two.  Applegate was the initial breakout star of the show and has had the most film work.  She appeared in The Big Hit and quickly got her own series, Jesse, which was given the prized but cursed 9:30 Thursday slot on NBC and lasted two seasons.  Over the first half of the 2000s, she appeared in films Just Visiting, The Sweetest Thing, and View from the Top, and appeared in two episodes of Friends as Rachel’s sister.  She was in Employee of the Month, Surviving Christmas and Will Ferrell smash Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy as Veronica Corningstone.  She got another series called Samantha Who? which aired on ABC and lasted two seasons.  She lent her voice to the last two Alvin and the Chipmunks movies as one of the Chippettes, and appeared in Going the Distance and Hall Pass.  She’s now starring in the first season of NBC’s Up All Night with Will Arnett.

2. Ed O’Neill – In the year Married…with Children ended, he appeared in small David Mamet movie The Spanish Prisoner.  He was in 1999’s The Bone Collector and appeared in 2000 NBC fantasy miniseries The 10th Kingdom as Relish, the Troll King.  In the early ‘00s, he starred in a couple of failed TV series.  First, on CBS, he starred as a police officer in Big Apple, which lasted just eight episodes.  Next, he starred in a Dragnet remake on ABC, which lasted a whole season, changing dramatically halfway through, and failed either way.  He appeared again in David Mamet films Spartan and Redbelt.  He shows up in four episodes of The West Wing as Pennsylvania Governor Eric Baker, who campaigns on and off for the Democratic presidential nomination, and eventually is offered the Vice Presidency in Matt Santos’ administration. He was in episodes of 8 Simple Rules for Dating My Teenage Daughter, Twenty Good Years and The Unit, and co-starred in failed one season David Milch show John fromCincinnati.  In 2009, he was cast as family patriarch Jay Pritchett in Modern Family, and seems likely to play that role for many years to come as the show has become a bona fide hit.

1. Katey Sagal (as Peggy Bundy) –  She appeared in three episodes of That ‘70s Show as Hyde’s mother.  She was in TV movies Mr. Headmistress, Chance of a Lifetime, God’s New Plan, and Smart House.  She voiced a character in several episodes of kids’ cartoon Recess. She co-starred in the short-lived 13 episode series Tucker on NBC in 2000 and in Hank Azaria-led Imagine That in 2002.  She was a regular cast member in 8 Simple Rules, playing the wife of John Ritter, who died soon after the first few episodes of the second season were filmed.  The series lasted three seasons.  Starting in 1999, and continuing on and off to the present day, she has voiced the character of Leela, a one-eyed mutant space captain, in Futurama.  She was in a handful of episodes of Disney Channel kids show Higglytown Heroes.  She was in TV movies Three Wise Guys and Campus Confidential.  She was in episodes of Ghost Whisperer, The Winner, and two of The Shield.  She was in a five episode arc of Boston Legal and a four episode arc of Eli Stone, and was in three episodes of Lost as John Locke’s girlfriend.  Currently, she stars as Ron Perlman’s wife on FX’s Sons of Anarchy, now in its fourth season.  She beat out Ed O’Neill by appearing in another series other than her current one that aired multiple seasons, along with her continuing apperances in now 114 episodes of Futurama.

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Power Rankings: Married…with Children, Part 1

9 Jan

(Power Rankings sum up:  Each week, we’ll pick a television show and rank the actors/actresses/contestants/correspondents/etc. based on what they’ve done after the series ended (unless we’re ranking a current series, in which case we’ll have to bend the rules).  Preference will be given to more recent work, but if the work was a long time ago, but much more important/relevant, that will be factored in as well.

Married… with Children lasted a crazy 11 seasons and 262 episodes, which is kind of mindblowing.  For some reason David Faustino always makes me think that this cast has gone nowhere, but the rest of the Bundy family’s careers argue strongly otherwise.  Without thinking too hard about it, I’m tempted to say this is the most popular show ever with an ellipsis (scripted show at least, talk shows are much more likely to use one – Later…with Jools Holland, a British music show is for some reason the other that comes to mind).  Included here are the four main family members, neighbor Marcy D’arcy, and her two husbands (not at the same time).  Let’s begin.

7.  Amanda Bearse (as Marcy D’arcy) – She’s the loser David Faustino wishes he could be.  She was in one episode of Nikki and has been in two of Drop Dead Diva.

6.  David Faustino (as Bud Bundy) – I automatically assumed that Faustino’s career would warrant just a short sentence and a joke, but while it’s not going to land him high in the rankings, it could have been a lot worse.  He was in single episodes of plenty of series, including Jesse (which starred Married…with Children co-star Christina Applegate), The New Adams Family, Unhappily Ever After, The X-Files, Batman Beyond, The Bernie Mac Show and two of Nash Bridges.  He was in a McDonalds commercial and two episodes of Entourage as himself.  He was in some low-budget National Lampoon drek as well, such as National Lampoon’s Pucked and his own web series called Star-ving.


5.  David Garrison (as Steve Rhoads) – He was in individual episodes of series Welcome to New York, Family Law, Sabrina, the Teenage Witch, Judging Amy, Nikki, Ed, That’s Life, and Arli$$.  He was in three episodes of The Practice as a U.S. Attorney, four episodes of The West Wing as an MSNBC talking head, and five of Law & Order as a judge.  He was also in single episodes of Everybody Loves Raymond, Without a Trace, and NYPD Blue.

4.  Ted McGinley (as Jefferson D’arcy) – He appeared in sequel Major League: Back to the Minors and in eight episodes of Aaron Sorkin dramedy Sports Night.  He was in three episodes of The West Wing and one of The Practice and appeared in TV movies Family Curse and Frozen Impact.  He co-starred in the short-lived Nathan Lane series Charlie Lawrence.  He starred in three seasons as Faith Ford’s husband in sitcom Hope & Faith.  He’s been in single episodes of ‘Til Death, Psych, Wizards of Waverly Place, and Breaking In, and provided his voice to two episodes of Family Guy.

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Spring 2012 Preview and Predictions: Cable (besides HBO)

6 Jan

(In order to meld the spirit of futile sports predictions with the high stakes world of the who-will-be-cancelled-first fall (now spring!) television season, I’ve set up a very simple system of predictions for how long new shows will last.  Each day, I’ll (I’m aware I switched between we and I) lay out a network’s new shows scheduled to debut in the fall (reality shows not included – I’m already going to fail miserably on scripted shows, I don’t need to tackle a whole other animal) with my prediction of which of three categories it will fall into.

These categories are:

1.  Renewal – show gets renewed

2.  13+ – the show gets thirteen or more episodes, but not renewed

3.  12- – the show is cancelled before 13

Spring note:  It’s a lot harder to analyze midseason shows as there’s no collective marketing campaigns going on at one time, as many of the shows start dates are spread (or are even unannounced for some)  Still, we’ll take partially educated guesses.  Also, they’re a lot less likely to get partial pick ups, so maybe that trade off will make it easier)

All other cable networks here.  USA and TNT are holding their new shows until the summer, so we’ve got entrants from BBC America, FX, Showtime, Starz and MTV.

BBC America

The Fades

The Fades has already aired in Britain but will be making its American debut this spring.  From a writer of Skins, The Fades is a supernatural show which revolves around the central concept that spirits of dead people who couldn’t get into heaven are all around us, known here as the titular Fades.  The main character Paul is a teenager who has apocalyptic dreams and the ability to see these Fades, an ability shared only by a select few, known as Angelics.  The Fades are bitter, and have slowly made progress in their attempt to have an impact in the real world, leading to a possible battle with the Angelics which Paul will be in the middle of.

Verdict:  Renewal – I shouldn’t really even have this category for imported shows – British shows generally air short runs anyway per season, six in this case, and it’s already aired months ago.  That said, there’s no official word, but as it’s been popular and well-reviewed across the pond this is just the smart money.

FX

Unsupervised – 1/19

Unsupervised is an animated series co-created by David Hornsby, best known as recurring character Rickety Cricket on FX hit It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia.  He also created and starred in the quickly cancelled How To Be A Gentlemen last fall on CBS.  Hornsby and Justin Long voice the main two characters, 15-year old best friends.  Kristen Bell, Romany Malco, Fred Armison, and Kaitlin Olson also have roles.

Verdict:  12- David Hornsby did not impress me with How To Be A Gentlemen, though FX has had a lot more success with quality comedies than CBS.  FX has a pretty good record overall, and there’s a clearly illustrious voice cast.  I’m really not sure why I’m skeptical, and hopefully it will be good, but it looks bad to me from the poster and I’m semi-arbitrarily voting against.

Showtime

House of Lies – 1/8

House of Lies is a comedy about the hilarious world of management consulting, starring Don Cheadle, Kristen Bell, and Ben Schwartz, best known as Parks and Recreation’s Jean-Ralphio.  Honestly, the first time I heard about this show, about management consultants working for clients around the world and doing whatever needs to be done to get the project finished and make money, I thought for sure it was a high intensity drama, especially since it was starring Don Cheadle, who is not exactly known for his comedic roles.  The fact that it’s a comedy floored me initially.

Verdict:  Renewal – don’t really know what to think, but Showtime, like HBO, which it desperately wants to be, likes to give shows second seasons if they do anything at all.

Starz

Spartacus: Vengeance – 1/27

This is kind of misleading.  I have no idea how to consider Starz’ continuing line up of Spartacus shows.  My normal inclination would just be to consider them different seasons of the same show, but Starz doesn’t exactly consider them that, and tragically the actor who played Spartacus died, so maybe that’s a factor.  Because Starz seems to, I’m going to treat it as a new show, though it’s clearly not.  A new actor takes on the Spartacus role and it’s filled with all the sex and violence that the Spartacus name has come to represent.

Verdict:  12- More cheating – so far each Spartacus has been treated as its own series, so it seems likely that if there’s another Spartacus, which there well may be, it will probably have a new name and thus be considered a new series.  I don’t really understand it, either.

MTV

I Just Want My Pants Back – 2/2

It’s about a twenty-something trying to figure out life, love, sex and work.  Could it possibly sound more generic?  The minor gimmick which gives the show its title is that the main character’s pants are stolen after a one-night stand and the character looks all over the city to find the pants and the girl who took them.  I’m guessing it won’t be good based on the fact that I don’t give a ton of credence to MTV original programming (I’m already too old to be the target audience, really) and most shows that sound like this are probably bad (even though the set up is so generic it could be any level of quality).

Verdict:  12- I have no idea what it takes for MTV to continue original series.  I must admit I’m mostly unfamiliar with MTV original series and don’t really have a beat on who watches them or what it would take to continue them.  This is nothing more than a guess in the dark.

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Spring 2012 Preview and Predictions: HBO

5 Jan

(In order to meld the spirit of futile sports predictions with the high stakes world of the who-will-be-cancelled-first fall (now spring!) television season, I’ve set up a very simple system of predictions for how long new shows will last.  Each day, I’ll (I’m aware I switched between we and I) lay out a network’s new shows scheduled to debut in the fall (reality shows not included – I’m already going to fail miserably on scripted shows, I don’t need to tackle a whole other animal) with my prediction of which of three categories it will fall into.

These categories are:

1.  Renewal – show gets renewed

2.  13+ – the show gets thirteen or more episodes, but not renewed

3.  12- – the show is cancelled before 13

Spring note:  It’s a lot harder to analyze midseason shows as there’s no collective marketing campaigns going on at one time, as many of the shows start dates are spread (or are even unannounced for some)  Still, we’ll take partially educated guesses.  Also, they’re a lot less likely to get partial pick ups, so maybe that trade off will make it easier)

HBO will get its own edition this season.  HBO debuted only one show in the fall, but has five coming out at different points over the spring, one drama, and four comedies, two which are co-produced with foreign networks.

Luck – 1/29

 

Big guns are on board for this show.  It’s created by HBO regular David Milch, who was behind the three season Deadwood, and co-created one season failure John from Cincinnati.  He also co-created NYPD Blue almost twenty years ago.  Michael Mann directed the first episode.  Luck is about the niche world of horse racing and stars Dustin Hoffman as degenerate gambler Chester“Ace” Bernstein.  Dennis Farina, Nick Nolte, Jill Hennessey and Michael Gambon also star.

Verdict:  Renewal – I really hope it’s good.  I haven’t watched all of Deadwood, but I’ve liked what I’ve seen, and while a show about such a strange insular world sounds risky it also sounds interesting.

Life’s Too Short

Life’s Too Short is a show written and directed by Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant and created by the two of them and famous dwarf actor Warwick Davis, star of Willow and Ewok Wicket from Return of the Jedi.  The show is a mockumentary, following an exaggerated version of Warwick Davis playing himself, as a dwarf who acts and runs a talent agency for small people.  Merchant and Gervais also appear as themselves.  A camera crew follows Davis around, promising classic Gervais and Merchant awkward comedy.

Verdict:  Renewal – cheating!  It’s a co-production with the BBC, where it aired this fall and it’s already been renewed for a second season airing in 2013.

Girls – sometime in April

I have an extremely limited amount of information about this series at my disposal.  Girls will be executively produced by Judd Apatow and is created by 25 year old Lena Durham who apparently made minor waves with film Tiny Furniture in 2010.  It’s about four girls in their twenties, and I read it billed, on one site, as the anti-Sex and the City.  Not in the constantly talking about sex way, as there’ll be lots of that.  More in the, instead of eating at fancy restaurants and buying expensive purses, they’ll be near broke.

Verdict: 12-  Honestly, I have no fucking clue.  HBO shows are far more likely to get second seasons than broadcast shows, but something’s got to get cancelled.

Angry Boys – 1/1

Co-produced by HBO and the Australian Broadcasting Corporation, Angry Boys is another mockumentary series, this time created by mockumentary veteran Australian Chris Lillies who has produced two mockumentary series before this one.  Lillies himself plays most of the important characters, including an American rapper (is blackface cool by now?), a champion surfer, a guard at a juvenile prison, and a Japanese mother.

Verdict:  Renewal – another cheat!  This was released in Australia nearly a year ago and is very popular there.  I can’t find anything about renewal, but unless they don’t want to continue or it’s a lot more expensive to film than it seems to be, international popularity may keep it afloat regardless of how it does in the US of A.

Veep – unscheduled

To refill their comedy stock after the comedy mass execution of ’11, HBO is throwing out a few options this spring.  In Veep, Julia Louis-Dreyfuss plays the Vice President of the US and it turns out the job isn’t quite as glamorous as it sounds.  Louis-Dreyfuss struggles with the day to day monotony of a post without much power.  Tony Hale (Buster of Arrested Development) and Anna Chlumsky (the titular girl in My Girl) co-star.

Verdict:  Renewal – Louis-Dreyfuss is talented enough and HBO will probably give her a better vehicle here than The New Adventures of Old Christine.  Plus, HBO needs the comedies.

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Spring 2012 Preview and Predictions: Fox

4 Jan

(In order to meld the spirit of futile sports predictions with the high stakes world of the who-will-be-cancelled-first fall (now spring!) television season, I’ve set up a very simple system of predictions for how long new shows will last.  Each day, I’ll (I’m aware I switched between we and I) lay out a network’s new shows scheduled to debut in the fall (reality shows not included – I’m already going to fail miserably on scripted shows, I don’t need to tackle a whole other animal) with my prediction of which of three categories it will fall into.

These categories are:

1.  Renewal – show gets renewed

2.  13+ – the show gets thirteen or more episodes, but not renewed

3.  12- – the show is cancelled before 13

Spring note:  It’s a lot harder to analyze midseason shows as there’s no collective marketing campaigns going on at one time, as many of the shows start dates are spread (or are even unannounced for some)  Still, we’ll take partially educated guesses.  Also, they’re a lot less likely to get partial pick ups, so maybe that trade off will make it easier)

Fox next.  While not CBS, Fox has been doing well lately, especially among the valued 18-49 demographic.  They’ll be debuting four shows this spring, including a spin-off, a movie port, and a couple of supernatural sci-fi efforts.

The Finder – 1/12

The Finder is a spin-off of Fox hit Bones, created by Bones’ creator Hart Hanson.  That’s really the most important detail here, but we’ll dig a bit further.  The spin-off will be taken from characters introduced in the sixth season of Bones specficailly for the purpose of spinning them off.  The main character, the titular Finder, is to be a House-like figure – eccentric, offensive, paranoid but brilliant and excessively competent.  His particular skill is well, finding things, anything, from people to places to things and he works out of his lawyer’s bar in Key West.

Verdict:  Renewed – I’m not sure what to think again here, but I’ll err with renewal on the Bones brand name.  It’s easy to overlook just how successful Bones has become for Fox, and if any of its magic could rub off on the spin off, Fox could really use a replacement for the likely soon to be departed House.

Alcatraz – 1/16

JJ Abrams executively produces this supernatural science fiction show about a few San Francisco detectives who realize that modern day crimes appear to be committed by people who were Alcrataz prisoners several decades ago.  The main character’s family worked in Alcatraz so she’s super interested, and comes up against a sinister government employee played by Sam Neill who tries to stymie the nascent investigation. The detectives bring in Alcatraz expert and all around nerd Jorge Garcia (Hurley from Lost) to help out and learn that this conspiracy goes all the way to the top.  Well, it goes somewhere anyway.

Verdict:  Renewed – I realize I’m a sucker for all of these supernatural sci-fi premises.  The shows often don’t work, crumbling under their own weight either right away, or after a couple of seasons, but at the beginning they sound so interesting, novel, and full of potential.

Touch – 1/25

Kiefer Sutherland is back on Fox, this time as father of an autistic boy who has the power to predict future events (Knowing anyone?  Mercury Rising?).  Oh, and Sutherland’s wife and the boy’s mother died (same person) in 9/11 (seriously, what’s the statute of limitations on shows/movies/books in which 9/11 is a peripheral but IMPORTANT part).  Danny Glover co-stars as an expert on children who works with the boy.  The show is from Tim Kring who I’m still angry at deep in my bones for everything associated with Heroes.

Verdict:  12-  After what happened to Heroes, I have no faith in Kring.  Kiefer’s good, but the premise doesn’t wow me.

Napoleon Dynamite – 1/15

Based on the movie, Napoleon Dynamite will follow the adventures of the title character, along with his brother, his best friend Pedro, and others, all of whom will be voiced by the actors who played them in the film.  Presumably, the show will share the same sense of humor as the film which became a surprise hit, and part of the stable of required viewing for anyone who went to college when I did (See: Donnie Darko, Requiem for a Dream).  Personally, while there were certainly funny parts, I’ve always thought the movie was highly overrated, but I appear to have been outvoted on this.

Verdict:  Renewed –  I’m definitely 50/50 here.  It’s an established property and the movie probably appealed to many of the people who are fans of the Fox animation block.  Also, it’s got the same creative team, so that helps it not be a cheap knock off.  I have my doubts, but Fox could use a non-McFarlane non-Simpsons animated success in the mix.

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Spring 2012 Preview and Predictions: CBS and NBC

3 Jan

(In order to meld the spirit of futile sports predictions with the high stakes world of the who-will-be-cancelled-first fall (now spring!) television season, I’ve set up a very simple system of predictions for how long new shows will last.  Each day, I’ll (I’m aware I switched between we and I) lay out a network’s new shows scheduled to debut in the fall (reality shows not included – I’m already going to fail miserably on scripted shows, I don’t need to tackle a whole other animal) with my prediction of which of three categories it will fall into.

These categories are:

1.  Renewal – show gets renewed

2.  13+ – the show gets thirteen or more episodes, but not renewed

3.  12- – the show is cancelled before 13

Spring note:  It’s a lot harder to analyze midseason shows as there’s no collective marketing campaigns going on at one time, as many of the shows start dates are spread (or are even unannounced for some)  Still, we’ll take partially educated guesses.  Also, they’re a lot less likely to get partial pick ups, so maybe that trade off will make it easier)

CBS, being the all-powerful leader in television ratings, as older people simply throw out their remotes, because it’s easier to just leave their TVs on the network, has decided that the only thing missing from their line up is a Rob Schneider sitcom.  Thus, because they have just one new show, we’ll be combining their preview with NBC’s.

CBS

Rob – 1/12

If not for the existence of Work It, this would have been a landmark moment for obviously terrible television.  Of course, it’s on CBS, so I’d be foolish to count it out so quickly.  Rob is about the comedic and charismatic Rob Schneider, who after years of bachelordom marries into a close knit Mexican-American family which happens to coincidentally conform to a number of Mexican-American stereotypes.  Cheech Marin plays his father-in-law.

Verdict: 12-  Please, please be right about this one.  I’m sure people will watch it because it’s on but at least being on CBS  means you have to beat other CBS shows to stay on, and I’m not convinced it can do that.  I’ve been wrong before about CBS though and I will be again.

NBC

Smash – 2/6

NBC’s putting so much stock into this show that they’ve tried to generate good karma by naming it aspirationally.  Postured as Glee for adults, Smash is about the production of a Broadway musical based on the life of Marilyn Monroe.  American Idol’s Katherine McPhee stars as a naïve Midwesterner come to take boradway by storm as the favorite for the lead.  TV veteran Debra Messing portrays one of the songwriters and Anjelica Huston plays the producer.

Verdict  Renewal – the midseason show I would be most surprised by a cancellation.  NBC is all in on Smash and postponement to midseason was a strategic decision rather than a lack of faith in the pilot.

Are You There Chelsea? – 1/11

Another title change, this time from Are You There Vodka, It’s Me Chelsea?, this show is based on the life of comedian Chelsea Handler, with the original title taken from her memoir, and changed because you can’t put vodka in the title of a network show for some reason.  Real edgy, NBC.  That 70’s Show’s Laura Prepon plays Chelsea Newman, based on Handler, while confusingly, Handler will play Chelsea’s older sister.

Verdict:  12-  It could easily get renewed, because who knows, but yeah, it’s looks terrible, and slightly smarter NBC audiences have not tolerated Whitney in the past and hopefully will extend that same feeling towards Are You There Chelsea?

The Firm – 1/8

Rather than a remake of the movie, The Firm is a continuation.  Set 10 years after the events in the film, The Firm explores what happens to Mr. and Mrs. McDeere after they come out of witness protection and start their own family and firm.  Josh Lucas plays Mitch McDeere and Molly Parker plays his wife Abby.  Much of the first season’s plot involves a battle to keep his firm independent against a takeover attempt by a shady firm.

Verdict:  12-  I don’t have a whole lot of faith in this relatively gimmicky remix.  Is The Firm that popular a product still in the public’s imagination even though the film was almost 20 years ago?

Bent – unscheduled

Amanda Peet stars as a recently divorced lawyer who hires a womanzing contractor to renovate her kitchen.  For some reason that contractor is the other main character, and I don’t know how they would keep the contractor if the show went beyond one season (they’re probably as confident as I am that it won’t.)  Jeffrey Tambor co-stars.

Verfict: 12-  I feel bad because I’ve always liked Amanda Peet.  It looks pretty dead in the water even if it ever makes TV.

Awake – unsecheduled

A far more interesting unscheduled show.     Awake stars Jason Issacs as a police detective involved in a car accident, who upon regaining consciousness, moves back and forth between two parallel lives – one in which his son dies, and his wife lives, and one in which the opposite happens.  The farther the two parallel lives more forward in time, the more they separate.  It sounds like it has the potential to be the best science fiction police procedural since Life on Mars.

Verdict:  12-  This seems so likely to share the same exact fate as fellow Kyle Killen show Lonestar.  Rave critical reviews, but nary a chance to get on its feet and become at all popular.

Best Friends Forever – unscheduled

One old friend moves in with another after the first friend divorces her husband.  This is mildly problemtic though, as the second friend’s boyfriend has just moved in and taken over the first friend’s old room.  Hilarity ensues.

Verdict:  12- A fairly low premise sitcom, it’s pretty difficult just to tell from the premise how it will be.  That said, I’m going to err on the side of cancelled – it is midseason after all.

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Spring 2012 Preview and Predictions: ABC

2 Jan

(In order to meld the spirit of futile sports predictions with the high stakes world of the who-will-be-cancelled-first fall (now spring!) television season, I’ve set up a very simple system of predictions for how long new shows will last.  Each day, I’ll (I’m aware I switched between we and I) lay out a network’s new shows scheduled to debut in the fall (reality shows not included – I’m already going to fail miserably on scripted shows, I don’t need to tackle a whole other animal) with my prediction of which of three categories it will fall into.

These categories are:

1.  Renewal – show gets renewed

2.  13+ – the show gets thirteen or more episodes, but not renewed

3.  12- – the show is cancelled before 13

Spring note:  It’s a lot harder to analyze midseason shows as there’s no collective marketing campaigns going on at one time, as many of the shows start dates are spread (or are even unannounced for some)  Still, we’ll take partially educated guesses.  Also, they’re a lot less likely to get partial pick ups, so maybe that trade off will make it easier)

ABC first up.  A network in transition, between the complete successful domination of CBS and the grueling failure of NBC, ABC is tied for the most midseason shows with NBC.  Let’s see how they look.

GCB – 3/4

Abbreviated from original titles Good Christian Bitches and Good Christian Belles, GCB promises to be a positively trashy soap about southern women decades out of high school who still act like they’re in senior year.  A woman, played by Leslie Bibb, who was the Queen Bee back in high school, comes back to her hometown, divorced, and ready to be the mocked rather than the mocking.  It’s created by Darren Star of trashy delights Beverly Hills 90210, Melrose Place, and the less trashy but still incredibly successful Sex and the City fame.

Verdict:  Renewed – These are so much harder than their fall brethren to pick.  I have absolutely no clue.  With Desperate Housewives leaving the air, maybe there’s a place for a trashy ironic soap to fill in.  Then again, maybe not.

The River – 2/7

The River is a post-Lost supernatural serial series with a kind of interesting premise.  A popular but enigmatic nature show host/explorer goes off on a quest for something or other in the Amazon rain forest, and gets lost, disappearing.  Six months later, just as everybody is ready to accept that he’s dead (Steve Fossett-style) his emergency beacon goes off.  His wife and son, with whom he has a complicated relationship, go off to find him, meeting all manners of strangeness and danger along the way.  I’m maybe more intrigued than I should be.  A couple of years ago I read the book The Lost City of Z by David Grann all about explorers searching through this area and it was absolutely fascinating, and while that was factual and not supernatural I think the fact that The River is reminding me of that makes me interested.  On the other hand, it looks a little more horror movie-esque than I’d like, with monsters, and irritating camera angles.  I will just have to wait and find out, I suppose.

Verdict:  12- Something’s got to fail, and these supernatural shows have had a lot of trouble since Lost.

Missing – 3/15

ABC’s second show about a family searching for a missing relation, though in this case it appears to be much more of an action show than a mysterious serial.  Ashley Judd portrays retired CIA agent Rebecca Winstone whose son disappeared during a summer internship in Italy.  I was going to say it sounds like Taken meets 24, but you could really just say it sounds like Taken.  That said, if it’s anything like Taken, I’m in, but I’m not yet convinced that Ashley Judd is cut from the same cloth as Liam Neeson.

Verdict:  12-  It’s a hard world for mid-season series.  They don’t get the same push generally as their fall brethren, and while a couple make it every year, it’s a tougher road they hoe.

Apartment 23 – unscheduled

Another show with a notable name change, from the far more evocative Don’t Trust The Bitch in Apartment 23, the show stars Krysten Ritter (of Breaking Bad and Veronica Mars minor fame among others) as the old title’s bitch who moves in with a mild-mannered roommate.  They fight, at least in the beginning, and James Van Der Beek plays an exaggerated jerkier version of himself as Ritter’s best friend.

Verdict: Renewed – so, it’s kind of unfair to have to choose the fate of a show that can’t even hit the schedule, so these midseason predictions are wonkier than ever.  Having said that, why not just double down on a show that actually sounds like it could be good if it ever does air, an exception with comedies in this past year.  Most of the pick is because of James Van Der Beek playing himself.

Scandal – unscheduled

Scandal’s got the kind of ABC pedigree you want, coming from Shonda Rhimes of Grey’s Anatomy and Private Practice fame.  It stars Kerry Washington as a former media relations consultant for the president who now is starting her own firm.  Henry Ian Cusack (best known as my beloved Desmond from Lost) co-stars, which is the most interesting part for me.

Verdict:  Renewed – I have absolutely no idea – ABC is putting on so many midseason shows and I can’t imagine more than a couple will likely be renewed, but I’ll vote they’ll at least give one more season to one of their favorite creators in Rhimes.  It seems like it will neither be terrible or great.

Work It – 1/3

I’m cringing as I even write the first sentence.  The fact that this show exists and was able to make it on air shows that there are startling flaws in the filters between the creation and airing of television shows on broadcast networks.  Work It is about two men who, after deciding the economic climate is more favorable to women, decide to attempt to dress up as women, and get jobs.  They then have to learn about being sensitive and all the problems women face.  An LGBT group made Bosom Buddies sound positively edgy and progressive in their smack down of Work It.

Prediction:  12- Are you kidding?  Cancellation picks this obvious come along maybe once a decade.  This is the Lebron James of cancellation picks.  This is the kind of show that you wouldn’t show critics ahead of time because you know the lambasting you would receive.  Who is the audience for this show?  Even stupid people aren’t stupid enough for this.  I can’t wait to watch, in a perverse way.

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Homeland: Season Review

29 Dec

I’ve repeated several times on this blog my contention that Homeland was far and away the best new show of this television season.  Now that the season is over, it’s time to take stock of where we are, how things went, and subsequently what things look like for next year.  My brother tried to describe Homeland as 24 on crack, but it’s really the opposite.  Instead of 24 sped up, it’s a couple of episodes of 24 slowed down, with fewer big action moments and more built up long-lasting tension.

First, the biggest event, the main concern of the finale, Brody’s attempt to blow himself up in the protection locker, killing the Vice President and many other high-ranking officials.  Right after it happened, I wished the explosion had happened, but after taking some time to think about it, I was happy with how everything went down.  The creators navigated a narrow passageway here but did it really well.  They faced a difficult choice.  Choose to blow up the bomb, and we’re entirely done with Brody, a character that has been at the heart of the show.  Choose not to, and it seems like a cop out for both the character and the show.  We need a good reason for him not to, and without one, it seems like the creators can’t pull the trigger on a major event.  One of the best parts of 24 is that outside of Jack Bauer, just about every character could get killed at any time.  If you cop out too many times, tense situations become like the show that cried wolf; it’s hard to keep the audience guessing if they feel pretty sure they know what’s going to happen.  In an interview I read, the creators noted that they thought about killing Brody, but that they thought he had more story left to tell, and I agree.  The writers managed this by first creating a situation in which the bomb didn’t go off due to a malfunction, and then having Brody’s daughter get through to him and convince him not to set it off.  If done another way, this would sound lame.  However, what really sold it was the work that had been put in the preceding episodes about the bond between Brody and his daughter.  There had been several scenes focusing on their close connection, and because of this groundwork laid, the moment at which she convinces her dad without exactly knowing it to not set off the bomb felt earned and meaningful rather than cheap.

Carrie’s shock therapy at the end was the other extremely powerful moment in the finale.  It was both sad and encouraging at the same time that Carrie was willing to resort to this radical treatment.  It was hard to watch (it’s difficult to believe that shock treatment is a serious medical treatment nowadays) but also reflected Carrie’s desire to change.  She was crazy, but it was almost comforting, as a viewer, that her craziness was legit craziness; she had a recognized mental disorder, rather than just being unexplainably irrational.  However, it was painful to see her come apart at the seams.

It was impossible not to enjoy Saul’s power play.  Saul was pretty much designed by the writers as the character the viewers are supposed to just about unabashedly like, and well, that’s what happened.  After weeks of reluctantly taking orders from boss David, he finally uses the knowledge he gained to put himself in the driver’s seat.

I loved the video Brody recorded about his reasons for becoming a terrorist.  It bridged a little bit of a gap between how someone could spin their terrorism into helping out America.  Sure, blowing up a bomb is never an acceptable way to protest the system, but at least in this case, the crimes he’s accusing the US of, of blowing up children, are actually true.  This was the extra step that helped me buy in to Brody’s actions.  Additionally, the video can become a plot point, out there in the world somewhere, for someone to discover evidence of Brody’s treachery.  I was pleased with the decision to kill Walker as well.  Walker played a key role in the season, but wasn’t really a character, and he served his purpose.

As a final couple of notes, the acting was all around excellent, led by Claire Danes and Damien Lewis, and I enjoy that James Rebhorn can play a crazy bipolar father on a show about the CIA while at the same time being a high-ranking officer on another TV show (White Collar).  Soon to follow, a look forward at the new season.

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Bored to Death: Final Season Report

28 Dec

It’s a sad time to be a Bored to Death fan.  Just as the show continues to improve each year, with short, and what I would guess, but don’t know to be, relatively inexpensive seasons, it still received its walking papers from HBO in a general comedy layoff, with How to Make It In America and Hung also sent to their graves.  With Entourage over, and Curb Your Enthusiasm possibly over (which it has been after each of the last three or so seasons), only Enlightened will be back of the existing HBO half hour programs.  Bored to Death, at this point in time was the best of these shows and season three was the best season yet of Bored to Death.

As always, the strength of the show was with the wonderful, zany, interplay between the three main characters and friends Jonathan, Ray, and George, played by Jason Schwartzman, Zach Galifianakis, and Ted Danson respectively.  Favorite recurring characters, such as Jonathan’s arch-rival Lewis played by John Hodgman, and George’s arch-rival Richard (played by Oliver Platt) returned.  The familiar New York, and Brooklyn in particular, setting returned as well, with the carousel in Prospect Park hosting a major scene.  New was  George’s artisanal restaurant which bans cellular phones;  instead, for emergencies, old-fashioned land lines are connected.  In this latest season, the show got weird, there can be no denying that.  Well, that’s wrong actually.  The show got weirder.  The seeds for strangeness were planted previously, but this season outdid all previously weirdness with elder love and incest becoming major plot points, obscuring furries and George’s daughter marrying a man George’s age.

The show grew stronger when it realized that it didn’t need to have a central mystery for Jonathan to solve every episode.  Not that those mysteries were bad by any means, as some of the best moments in the show happened during those mysteries, but the show was at its finest when it could feel free to swing from a mystery to a George singing lesson to a Super Ray signing to a Jonathan night out with George’s alcoholic daughter.  The humor was often absurd, but Bored to Death turned from a show I smiled along with in the first season to one I laughed out loud at several times an episode in the third.  The show kept its film noir trappings throughout, and used them well without feeling hemmed in by them.  The cast all had great comic timing and the look of the show complimented the absurd situations.

Mostly though, it was a treat every week to spend time with the characters.  Television is populated with shows about friends but few are such unabashed paeans to friendship as Bored to Death, and few feature characters I’d like to hang out with at a bar and have a beer with, or in Jonathan’s case, a glass of white wine with, as much as these three.  The friendship was never better framed than in the fifth episode of the third season when Jonathan and George attend a counseling sessions to repair their relationship.  Both parties air their grievances, and after George is still frustrated, Jonathan decides the best way to get back in George’s good graces is to help take down George’s rival’s restaurant.  Though a series of zany adventures, he figures out the fraudulent practices of the restaurant and exposes it, which finally mends the rift between Jonathan and George, actions speaking louder than words.  I’m glad I at least have 24 episodes to relive the good times over and over.

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Fall 2011 New Show Ranking

27 Dec

Well, we’ve just seen how I did in my predictions about the new shows in fall 2011.  Let’s take a look at what I actually think of them, rankings style.  I didn’t think it was a particularly strong season, as most of the shows sat in the healthy middle of mediocrity with a fair few as true garbage.  Although it’s a linear ranking, I’ve tried to point out when there’s a large gap between shows here and there.

1.  Homeland – far and away the best new show of the year – it’s not particularly close.  I’m not sure where they’ll go from here, but first season a must watch

2.  Revenge – surprisingly good for a trashy primetime soap and although that sounds like a backhand compliment, I really don’t mean it that way.  I enjoy this show thoroughly and Madeline Stowe is great.

3.  New Girl – improved as the season went on and seemed to find its place, the last of the three shows on this list that I’ve seen every episode of, and thus there’s a little drop off here

4.  Boss – I haven’t cared enough to watch more, but I was more impressed than I thought I’d be in the first episode, and more episodes could easily move this in either direction

5. Hell on Wheels – solid but not spectacular, I wish it was better, but I’m glad it’s not worse

6.. Ringer – 6 is higher than it should be, but it’s really just in a similar tier with the next few shows and I’ve seen more of it than the next few

7.  American Horror Story – I’ve never seen a show like it in any way, and I think I mean that as a compliment

8. The Secret Circle – the show is much more entertaining than it has any right to be for someone of my age and my gender

9. Terra Nova – It’s not great but it’s really not bad either.  There’s something to work with and I feel slightly more than ambivalent about continuing to watch

10.  Suburgatory – newer episodes are definitely better than the older episodes, and I like the two main actors, but it constantly battles not to not be a poor man’s Mean Girls

11.  Prime Suspect – you’ve just entered procedural country.  Prime Suspect is probably slightly the best of the bunch – it’s a minor shame it’s being cancelled but no Terriers

12.Grimm – second best of procedurals, my friend likes it because it takes place in his home state of Oregon, so props for that

13.Person of Interest – second in a row of shows my dad watches – he likes this one better, but I prefer Grimm slightly

14.Up All Night – it’s not bad, it’s just not really that good either – what in the world is Maya Rudolph doing here

15.Unforgettable – this may actually be better than one of the two above it – who even knows at this point?

16.A Gifted Man – repeat what I said about Unforgettable.  The show is fine but hardly compelling

17.Pan Am – we’re still in the section of shows I don’t completely want to bash, I just want to let them be ignored

18. Hart of Dixie– Rachel Bilson is good, I guess. Alabama seems pretty boring.  Is that the message?  Still not at the bad ones.

19.Enlightened – People tell me it gets better after the first episode, and maybe it does.  Laura Dern’s character was just so annoying.

20.Free Agents – shows starting to get bad here – it had two good characters, and a bunch of terrible ones

21.Once Upon A Time – why do people like this?  This is exactly the type of show people like to pretend is interesting and complex but really isn’t

22.  Man Up – men aren’t really men anymore part 1 – possible but hard to win with that premise

23.  Last Man Standing – men aren’t really men anymore part 2- much more patently offensive than the previous

24.  Allen Gregory – animated misstep – close enough to a good show to maybe understand what the creators were thinking but far enough away that it will never get there

25. I Hate My Teenage Daughter –  a generic instructional example of a bad traditional sitcom

26.  How To Be A Gentlemen – why do so many actors who were in shows with more modern forms of comedy (It’s Always Sunny inPhiladelphia, Mr. Show, Flight of the Conchords) sink to this?

27.  Playboy Club – Saying that Amber Heard is attractive is about the nicest thing I can say about this show

28.  Chalie’s Angels – Saying that Minka Kelly is attractive is about the nicest thing I can say about this show

29.  Whitney – and here we are, a Whitney Cummings two-some – whoever thought this show made sense after Community, Parks and Recreation and The Office should be shot, tarred, and feathered

30.  2 Broke Girls – there is nothing redeeming about this show – the fact that it is popular embarrasses the US as much as the existence of the death penalty

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